and feel pressure to decide, I NEVER have sovereignty-awareness, because I feel ALONE and in CHARGE, not curious/expectant to see what SovereignShepherdJesus does NEXT in me, others, circumstances. My human-wisdom is lord of my life, not Jesus. I only experience sovereignty-awareness -- the benefit of Jesus in THIS life, when the Spirit freshly convicts me of human-wisdom-dependency, so I can CONFESS. Ahhh. The nicest, sweetest, kindest thing Jesus ever does for me, is not to give me what my human-wisdom wants, but to momentarily open my eyes to see the unbelief weighing me down, robbing me of the joy and peace that's mine in Him, and robbing me of fruitfulness with the seculars around me.
-- Dave McCarty, GospelFriendships, always needy for the Spirit's fresh work
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