is when the Spirit of Jesus opens my eyes to see how pathetically helpless I am — powerless to make my life work, to engineer happiness for myself and those I love. I see this in my saner moments, and then I’m actually thankful for my pathetic helplessness. And enjoy it! Am comforted by it. Usually, however, I’m in denial, needing to be rescued from the Curse of independency, the idiotic notion my ancestors Adam and Eve had, that independency produces happiness, that being free to captain my soul, master my fate, will bring me contentment in this life. Independency brings me misery. Only dependency on Jesus has ever made me happy. Independency is an illusion, a myth, perpetrated on me by the alliance of the world, flesh, devil. Why? So I operate by puny human power, like pre-believers, undermining my fruitfulness with them. Why? If I cannot see how pathetically helpless I am apart from Him, how would they know/see, and why would they be interested in Him, apart from whether there’s a Heaven or Hell? Most don’t believe in an afterlife, and afterlife is only one of the benefits to following Jesus.
I don’t think I’m alone in running from pathetic helplessness. The Church seems little different than the world in the kind of leaders we seek: strong, confident, successful, make-it-happen. Independent/agendified/driven. Oh sure, we Christian leaders learn to put on airs of humility and camouflage our independence. Unconsciously. Satan could not be more pleased. No wonder we’re no threat to the enemy’s hold over pre-believers in our day. No wonder we’re the laughingstock of the watching world. Without Jesus-humility and Jesus-love, how could we believers possibly be one, that the world might believe? Human power, not Jesus power.
–StrongDave/ShepherdDave, needing prayer for fresh conviction of the sin of independence, so he is momentarily transformed into pathetically helpless DumbSheepDave, asking and thanking about everything, curious and expectant to see what ShepherdJesus will do next, in Dave, others, circumstances, so the pre-believers around him are wowed by the difference Jesus makes in his life, and want a Shepherd too (please pray now)
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